Making Children Need to Hear You Without Yelling

Communicating with children should occur in both directions. You talk to him, he listens, and vice versa without any one of the intonation of his voice rising. There are effective ways to communicate with children without having to shout. Here's tips:

Message "I"
There is one expressive communication techniques for use with the child, his name is "my message". There are 3 key words in this technique, namely, I felt, when, and because.

When you are in a situation when the child asks for something now, you can use this technique, do not forget to use the three keywords, for example, "Mama (I) feel upset when you interrupt the work Mama, because I had to finish it before we go to the park play it. "

This technique is effective because it focuses on you and your feelings. This technique does not blame anyone, but it becomes a simple statement of your perspective on the situation at hand.

Emphasize kepositivan
One way to communicate effectively with your children is to develop in a positive sentence. Avoid the words "no" or "no" when talking with children. Rather than saying, "Do not throw toys on the floor," better to say, "Toys that his place in the toy basket." Although the changes are simple, the choice of words you use have a major impact on the reactions of children and the way he interacts with others.

Belanjar listen
Learning and practicing receptive communication is an important aspect to enhance parent-child interaction. Very important about what you say (or what is expressed in your child) be heard and understood. Listening to children is part of the receptive communication, and can be used as a way to understand children.

When you hear a child, stop all forms of activity you're doing and focus on your child. Kneeling, sitting, or a little lift on the bench for you and he are in an equal level. When the small talk, really listen. Ask yourself, "What is perceived by my child?" Then, repeat what you hear or what you think he is feeling (if his voice is less clear).

The key words similar to the first point, "you feel, because". For example, "You feel upset because you want to go to the playground right now when Mama stopped working." According to Terry Meredith, Speech and Language Pathologist from TLM Consulting, it is important for children to express their feelings through language. Parents also can tell the child that it is not a problem to feel some of the same thing at once.

Actions more clearly than words
Remember, that your thoughts are communicated through signs non-verbal. The way you carry yourself can say many things rather than words.

Your breath is very tight, wrinkled forehead, hands clenched, and then suddenly your child asks, "Mama mad?" then you replied with a frown, "Nah, Mama baseball mad." Your body language is clear show you angry and upset, but you actually say the opposite. When actions and words you do not sync, you send a double message to the child. You lied to feelings, but you show what you feel through your body.

3:23 AM | 0 komentar | Read More

6 Pillars Positive Parenting on Children

Nothing special schools to become parents. But parents still need to learn to apply positive parenting on children in order to form the positive character of children in the future. Science parenting you can get from various sources, such as seminars or articles in magazines and books.

The first pillar is meant, partnership or cooperation between fathers and mothers (parenting partnership.) Parents must learn to work together well, especially in the teaching of values ​​to the child's life. There should be no difference of opinion in the teaching discipline and norms of life. Thus, the child will comply with parental guidance due to see both father and mother agreed to give the same view.

The second pillar consists of "4B", said Hannah, namely belailah, talk, play, and thinking. Hannah describes the research of Dr. Harold voth, a psychiatrist from Kansas, United States, regarding the element of caresses. How many times caress you give the child every day will affect the growth-development. For example, four fondling the child in a day can make your child always survive. Eight fondling a day to support the growing child. While 12 fondling will make your child physically and emotionally healthy. The function is also valid for fondling a married couple. Fondling able to drive the depression, make us younger, sleep more soundly, and boost immunity.

Then Hannah encourage parents to establish communication with the child. Communication can be done in many ways, one by reading books to children and ask their opinions about the contents of the book.

Besides talking, parents also should take the time to invite children to play by involving physical. On the chance to play, the role of fathers much more likely to encourage children to do activities like sports or do other games. Not only the physical play, children also should be taught to play by using exposure to the mind. This helps children to manage the natural mind. Exercise also helps children communicate thought what he was thinking because the mind is not necessarily the same children and parents.

The third pillar, between parents and children always have an agreement in implementing discipline, and apply the rules consistently. The rules do not always have to be made by parents. For example in the agreed hours of learning. Children and parents can discuss, how many hours it takes the child to repeat a school lesson. Parents show love but with firmness.

"Fourth pillar, parents must understand the negative emotions since early childhood. When our children are sad and cry, ask why she was sad, or what made him cry. We try to understand the feelings of the child to repair negative emotions," said Hanny.

The fifth pillar, namely the importance of positive language style for the child physically and emotionally healthy. In this section, Hannah cites a statement from the Task Force for Personal and Social Responsibilities in America who explained that every day people listen to 432 words and negative sentences, and only 32 positive words and sentences. As many as 80 percent of those hurtful words, give a bad psychological effects, and do not motivate people to rise up. The rest, 20 percent of people survive even hears those words. Therefore, parents need to learn not to excessively angry, let alone threaten the child.

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Parents Make Children Self Confidence

Confidence given to the child's parents affect the independence and confidence. It was included in liberating children looking to experience a different adventure which one day will bring a positive influence for himself. This is evidenced Skip Yowell, co-founder of American manufacturers of branded JanSport bags.

The man who was familiarly called Skip are believed to free themselves for the adventurous, look for a different experience, and observe life on the ground, the provision of individuals to become independent and confident. The impact then, the individual is better able to tread life, able to bring many innovations and confident with himself to realize the dreams and desires. In addition to his own practice the principle of this adventurous life, Skip also gave freedom to his daughter for the adventurous.

"When my daughter was 17, I pay for around six countries in Europe alone. I said to him, bertualanglah, look for challenges. Son of my backpacking to Europe and he visited museums, historic sites, make friends with foreign students there. He learned to get along and meet with different cultures and people. From this trip, he learned to be independent and build confidence, "the story of Skip to Female Compass after the talk show in the series of programs"

Skip said, the key, parent (parents) to give full trust to the child. That way, children freely explore themselves and the opportunity to gain different experiences in life that a provision in the future. Now, the daughter of Skip aged 25 and follow in the footsteps of his father adventurous hobby. "My daughter is also a traveler," he said.

What about you? Forms of trust as what has been given to children? No matter how small your faith against children, have a major influence for him. He'll grow up independent and sure of himself because he knows that his parents believe fully and support whatever he does.

3:20 AM | 0 komentar | Read More